“And that, kids, is how you make a perfect martini.”

“I work my fingers to the bone for you!”

“G is for gin! I is for ice! N is for neurotic, you know it’s really nice…”

“I call this one Early Tumblr Investors Exult Over the Yahoo Acquisition. You like?”

Ingest massive quantities of gin and helium, and you’ll damn sure be seeing unicorns, we guarantee.

Plutonium-infused brandy and fake seascapes are nice, but it’s Hot Tuna cranked to 11 that really makes a Friday night.

“And then the clownfish was all, ‘Oh, no, you didn’t,’ and I was totally — hey, turtle, come back here!”

Today’s forecast: mostly cloudy with an excellent chance of some much-needed precipitation.

“Frau Blücher! Come quickly! I have created the perfect vessel for your Ovaltine!”

“Good Lord, Maude, what I wouldn’t give for opposable thumbs and a functional alimentary canal right now.”

The thing we like best about French techno musicians is how coy and understated they are.